Rubbing her eyes, the newly awoken Aspen Blythe moaned softly and then proceeded to give her blueberry iMac a little good morning kiss. She giggled and said, "Aren't you glad I used my Scope?"
The iMac beeped and Aspen smiled. She loved her computer more than anything. In her mind, it was better than a friend, better than a boyfriend, a Moffatts tape, a Power Rangers erotica, or even friend okra!
This particular day, Aspen was home alone for several hours. Her sister, Meri, was at Oktoberfest practicing her German. Her parents were off shopping for a new microwave. Her boyfriend was off at some punk concert. Her best friend didn't live in town. So, Aspen decided to have a nice, long, leisurely day with her computer.
First, she booted up and connected to the Internet. Just the sound of the modem dialing gave her a little shiver. She sighed happily and loaded ICQ. She kept herself on "Invisible" and waited for someone she wanted to talk to. After a very short while of nothing happening, Aspen moved the window out of the way and went into her internet browser. She logged into her e-mail and happily devoured every single, solitary message, noting messages from several friends and responding to a few Internet mailing groups that she feared she would fall behind in if she didn't. She would get to the rest later. Or, so she thought.
Shortly after she logged out of her e-mail, Aspen decided to do some writing. She opened a new program that she'd downloaded which allowed her to talk into a microphone and have her words appear on screen. With a giggle, she began dictating a particularly steamy bit of erotica from the latest part of her story. As she got to the climax of the story, she heard a noise. She paused for a moment and heard it again. It sounded like her computer was moaning. Aspen giggled again. "Oh my gosh, my computer's getting off!"
The computer screen popped up with an "error box" that read, "I love you, Aspen. You are the best writer ever to grace my cathode ray tube. You are wonderful. Your stories make my hard drive vibrate."
Smiling sweetly, Aspen traced a finger over the 'X' key lightly. "That's so sweet of you to say." She cooed into the microphone.
"My circuits are blushing. Baby, you sure do know how to press me in all the right places."
"You don't do such a bad job yourself," she mused, thinking of the Mac's cool blue exterior and smooth black screen. "What do you want me to do?" She spoke, slowly, seductively, and sensuously.
Another box, "Would you…finish the story? Please?" She could almost hear the whimper in the hard drive. Laughing to herself, Aspen once again immersed herself in her writing. Only, for once, she was doing it for a thing that really appreciated her efforts.
A noise brought her (and the computer) back from the cyber world of technical bliss. The new mail signal. "Damn." She spoke quickly, minimizing her word program and opening the e-mail. She typed in her name and password, and then swore she felt the computer give a shudder.
"Oh Aspen, you sure do know how to give good log-on!" The error box almost screamed at her.
Giggling, and quite pleased with herself, Aspen checked her mail and found (surprisingly enough) a forward that she wanted to keep. Taking a floppy disk, she inserted it into the drive and the computer gave something of a primal scream and an error box with one word on it popped into view: More.
"You like that?"
"Yes."
"That's what I love about you," she mused, "You're the only man, or pseudo-man in my life who'll willingly accept a three and a half inch floppy."
"Anything for you, baby."
Deciding to tease her favorite computer in the world just a little more, Aspen excused herself for a moment, leaving the computer to whimper at the absense of her voice and touch. Aspen quickly ran to the kitchen, grabbed a straw and some juice and came back to her panting computer. With a smile, she languidly pushed the straw into the juice and stuck her tongue out to help her grasp the straw between her lips. Then, she created a little bit of suction. The cool liquid invaded her mouth and she quickly swallowed every last drop. The computer beeped every few seconds and lights were flashing on it in several different places. Aspen reached over and slid her hand along the side of her computer. Within moments, the computer flashed a message that said, "I am about to explode!" and then, a moment of complete silence.
Aspen took another sip of her juice and the computer began to send sparks flying all over with a luxurious, mechanical moan. Aspen grinned in spite of herself. She kissed the computer and gave it a little lick. "Yummy."
Deciding that it would be for the best, Aspen shut down her computer and went off to watch television to let her computer rest up for next time.