Christmas Eve with Taylor Hanson

 

7:42 a.m. December 24, 2000
    I, Taylor Hanson, awake from pleasant slumber by the repeated slamming of a pillow to my head.
7:43 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Isaac Hanson, older brother, gets beaten down by said pillow in retaliation.
7:44 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Fight ensues.
7:47 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Diana Hanson, mother, breaks up the fight with the lungpower usually attributed to marching bands and the large brass sections of orchestras.
    Giggling between two fighters begins
7:49 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Giggling ends after threats administered…a bit more giggling then the end.
    Fight for prime bathroom ensues and quickly ends after mother gives more threats.
7:52 a.m. December 24, 2000
    After much muttering under the breath and personal grumbling, I step into the shower.
7:52 [2] a.m. December 24, 2000
    After realizing too late that the water heater in our home has not finished reheating itself I step back out of the shower.
8:02 a.m. December 24, 2000
    After significant checking of the water temperature I again step into the shower.
8:03 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Realize that the only shampoo in this particular bathroom is Shocking Strawberry. Much grumbling begins.
8:03 [2] a.m. December 24, 2000
    Debate over whether or not to suck it up and use this shampoo starts.
8:14 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Step out of the shower smelling like strawberries fields.
8:17 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Zac, younger brother, passes me in the hallway looking like death revisited.
    Do not vocalize this thought.
8:18 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Much ruckus is heard from the second floor bathroom.
    Isaac ascends to the kitchen complaining about Zac's lack of patience in the morning.
8:21 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Fight over the last bowl of Rice Krispies cereal begins with Avery, younger sister.
8:23 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Fight ends. Avery wins only because I do not want to have to deal with the attitude that would result.
8:46 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Isaac, Zac and I step out the back door of our house with two sets of car keys. Race between Isaac and I unfolds.
8:48 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Race to the driver's side door ends with much pushing and shoving.
    I win. Much gloating begins.
8:50 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Gloating ends after I am hit in the face with a glove.
8:52 a.m. December 24, 2000
    While turned around to back out of our garage I smack Isaac upside the head. Again a melee begins.
8:54 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Battle ends. I taste blood. Anger simmers as I plot my revenge.
    Search for something to stop the blood begins.
8:55 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Search yields 66 cents, large quantities of lint, old crayons, more hair accessories than most middle-sized salons, unmarked CDs, an old car registration. Nothing to stop the blood.
8:56 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Car is driven back up to the garage.
    Isaac enters the house to get napkins.
8:59 a.m. December 2000
    Isaac reenters the car.
    "What took you so long?"
    Explanation: "I got sidetracked by Mom."
8:59 [2] a.m. December 24, 2000
    My cell phone rings. Parental lecture about the dangers of fighting while driving begins.
    Back out of the driveway.
    Parental lecture on the dangers of talking on cell phones while driving follows.
9:00 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Cell phone call is aborted.
9:06 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Encounter traffic on the highway.
    Argument over radio stations commences.
9:08 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Quick check of the radio shows no viable suspects.
9:09 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Isaac scans the CDs in the car and finds very little worth listening to.
9:09 [2] a.m. December 24, 2000
    Desperate for music of any kind we settle for Kid Songs Vol. 3.
9:17 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Traffic is not easing.
    After the third round of "Old McDonald Had a Farm," Kid Songs Vol. 3 is taken out of the CD player.
    Silence begins.
9:54 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Silence breaks with a strange odor in the car.
    Windows are opened.
    No one confesses to the crime.
    No questions are asked.
10:07 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Zac awakens from his not-quite-alive state and asks for coffee.
10:08 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Argument over where the nearest Dunkin Donuts is.
    Car passes a Dunkin Donuts sign on the highway and silence again is observed save for the occasional backseat grumbling of Zac.
10:12 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Quest for good music begins again and a truce is found.

10:46 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Enter the mall parking lot.
10:47 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Navigator Isaac spots a parking space.
    Much skillful driving starts.
10:48 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Mission aborted after space was found to be occupied by a Jetta.
    The heckling of Isaac begins.
10:51 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Endless driving around the parking lot has brought us nowhere.
    Zac proceeds to whine about the lack of legroom.
    Isaac pulls his seat forward.
10:52 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Potential prime parking space is rumored.
    All passengers hold their breath.
10:53 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Mission accomplished.
    Theme song from Mission Impossible hummed in three-part harmony.
10:59 a.m. December 24, 2000
    The Hanson brothers enter the mall.
    Hanson brothers exit mall after we realize we entered the lingerie section of Macy's.
11:04 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Hanson brothers enter the mall from the safe non-girlie food court entrance.
11:05 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Three brothers break up.
    Plan to meet back at food court at 1:00.
11:07 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Bypass the gargantuan baby stroller in the middle of the aisle.
    Step into personalizing novelty shop for a gift for Jessica, younger sister.
11:11 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Jessica gift mission accomplished.
    Given instructions to return at 2:45 to pick up the gift.
11:26 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Encounter foot traffic outside of upscale electronics store. All paths are blocked.
11:28 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Execute escape plan #1 and maneuver through obnoxious smelling candle shop.
11:31 a.m. December 24, 2000
    In line to buy obnoxious smelling candles for mother.
11:42 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Still in line.
    Debate starts on whether or not to throw money at the counter and make a run for it.
11:44 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Greet cashier.
    Cashier recognition.
    Cashier giggles.
11:46 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Cashier composes herself enough to handle the $24 purchase.
    Hand over my credit card.
11:47 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Regret that decision.
    Notices the cashier holding said credit card like the Holy Grail.
    Regrets the trip to the mall.
11:48 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Sign my name as sloppily as possible so as to impede the cashier from selling it on eBay.
    Understands the chances of that happening are slim and none.
11:51 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Outside the store I reevaluate who I still need to buy gifts for.
    The list is everyone except Jessica and mother.
    Grumble quietly to myself.
11:52 a.m. December 24, 2000
    Curse myself for not shopping sooner.
12:14 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Inside a men's clothing store I encounter brother Isaac.
    Drop clothing for Isaac back onto the counter while trying to be as casual as possible.
    Fail miserably and knock over a store display of socks wrapped up like ornaments.
12:20 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Finish cleaning up the display with two annoyed workers.
    Apologize.
    Leave store.
12:23 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Enter another clothing store while never straying from the wide main aisles.
12:34 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Search begins for a cashier who is not on break, trying to slit their wrists with hangers or handling a line longer than the Mississippi River.
    Grumble under my breath about how commercial Christmas has become.
12:39 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Settle for young-looking woman behind the men's counter.
    Get in line.
12:43 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Young woman is sent on break.
    Relieved by a woman who looked older than dust with glasses thicker than Coke bottles.
    Sigh deeply.
12:45 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Sigh again.
    Rest arm on the clothes rack closest to my spot in line.
    Remember the earlier incident and stand up straight again.
12:52 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Finally make it up to Old Maude the cashier.
12:54 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Maude finds the right pair of glasses to read the price tag.
12:55 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Maude attempts to use the store's scanner to ring in the garment.
12:57 p.m. December 24, 2000
    While Maude is on the phone trying to get help for her scanner issues, I take the price tag and swipe it past the scanner's laser.
    Scanner magically begins working again.
12:57 [2] December 24, 2000
    Maude is embarrassed.
    To hide her embarrassment she glares pointedly at me.
12:59 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Price has rung up wrong.
    Mention this to Maude.
    The flustered woman cannot handle this news and must change her glasses yet again to read the price tag.
1:00 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Argument over whether or not the item is on sale or not starts.
1:00 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    Curse myself for mentioning the price.
1:02 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Waiting for management intervention.
1:03 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Search for a sharp object to pierce through my chest because I mentioned the price difference.
1:05 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Angry looking manager shows up.
    The glaring from both people behind the counter is enough to make me avert my eyes.
1:09 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Leave the store with my item rung in with the right price.
    Silently pray that I never encounter Maude ever again.
1:10 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Notice that I am ten minutes late for lunch with the other two.
    Begin running.
1:11 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Barely miss cross checking a small child into a fountain.
    Slow down.
1:12 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Notice an attractive girl behind the counter at the sports store.
    Make mental note to go to the sports store.
1:12 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    Continue quest for the food court.
1:14 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Find Ding and Dong in line at the pizza counter.
    Conversation includes complaining about me being late, complaining about the lines, complaining about the people, complaining about the boring music, complaining about the lack of good gifts left in the stores.
1:16 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Conversation turns to the girl behind the counter at the sports store.
    Find out she's only fourteen.
    Resign her to Zac and move on.
1:21 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Eating commences.
    Conversation is limited to grunts and hand gestures due to the lack of ability to speak clearly with food in our mouths.
1:27 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Linger over the last of the soda to work out a game plan for the rest of the day.
1:28 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Tempers flare.
1:29 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Depart leaving Ding and Dong to duke it out at the table.
1:32 p.m. December 24, 2000
    On the hunt for a poster for Avery.
1:35 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Push my way through the picture store.
1:36 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Find the dance section.
    Begin flipping through the posters.
1:37 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Find only dorky posters.
1:38 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Curse Avery's particular tastes.
1:41 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Continue the search.
1:43 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Give up search and purchase a gift certificate.
1:43 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    Laugh to myself that she will have to shop for her poster herself.
    Remember Avery's attitude during the morning's breakfast brigade.
    Laugh harder.
1:44 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Observe the people starting to stare.
    Clamp mouth shut.
2:21 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Walk by aforementioned men's clothing store to check out the scene.
2:22 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Walk by casually again looking for the two employees who were witness to my public embarrassment.
2:22 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    No sign of them.
    Store looks fairly empty.
2:24 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Make my move.
2:26 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Find the gift I wanted to get Isaac.
    Am spotted by the two employees.
    They do not look happy.
2:26 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    Steer clear of Angry Employees #1 and #2 and head to the registers.
2:31 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Whip out my credit card and pray for a quick transaction.
2:32 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Come to the conclusion that I am comic relief for God when my credit card is declined.
2:32 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    "I don't know why it would be declined."
    Cashier gives me the because it has no money on it, Retard look.
2:33 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Angry Employee #1 has spots us and comes over to investigate.
2:33 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    "Is there a problem?"
    Am sure he practices that line in front of the mirror every morning.
2:33 [3] p.m. December 24, 2000
    "My card was declined but I don't think it should have. Is there any way you could try it again?" All the while giving him my best please don't mess with me look.
2:33 [4] p.m. December 24, 2000
    "We can but do you have another card as back-up?" His look says don't toy with me kid I control the situation.
2:34 p.m. December 24, 2000
    "Actually I don't. I only carry one card."
    His self-righteous smirk was enough to make me want to bear my teeth.
2:34 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    Cashier swipes card.
    Wait begins.
2:35 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Continue to wait for processing.
2:35 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    Waiting…
2:36 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Receipt prints.
    Transaction accepted.
    Am barely able to contain my excitement.
2:38 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Thank employees and back away from the counter smirking to myself.
    Pray that I do not trip on my victorious walk out of the store.
2:38 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
    Must grease up my ego to fit it out the door as I step outside to the mall.
2:41 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Step into the toy store.
2:42 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Encounter some commotion as I turn the corner to the Barbie aisle.
2:42 [2] December 24, 2000
    Two mothers have started a screaming match over the last Princess Bride Barbie doll.


-- Amendment --
Frankly I do not want to talk about what happened next. I am hoping that with counseling someday I will be able to talk about the horror that is searching for a Barbie on the day before Christmas with many mothers who have had one too many cups of coffee.

3:07 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Join Isaac and Zac at the car.
    Isaac manhandles the keys from my hands in order to drive.
3:07 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Slip into the backseat behind him.
    "You do realize there was no need for violence. You brought your own keys with you this morning genius."
3:07 [3] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Isaac sputters a retort.
    Zac rolls his eyes.
3:09 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
The fight to get into traffic starts.
3:12 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Yell at Isaac for not being a more aggressive driver.
    Isaac floors the gas to pull into the exit lane.
3:12 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Zac and I clap for him.
    He does not think this funny.
    We do.
3:16 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Still inside the mall parking lot.
3:21 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Whip my cell phone out of my pocket and call home.
3:24 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Talk with Walker Hanson, father.
    Assure him that we will be home by four o'clock to get ready for the family gathering that begins at 5:00.
3:47 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Pull into the driveway.
    Race to get dibs on the good bathroom.
3:49 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Jessica is occupying the good bathroom.
3:52 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Trudge up to my parents' room and prepare to beg to use their bathroom.
3:53 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Occupied.
    Mutter under my breath as I walk back downstairs.
4:07 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Step out of the shower for the second time in one day smelling like strawberry fields.
    Not happy about it.
4:09 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Step into my room to change into more "presentable" clothes.
4:10 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Just as I'm standing in full view of the world in my underwear Mackenzie, younger brother #2 flings open the bedroom door.
    Shimmy into my dress pants a bit more quickly.
4:10 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
In my haste, put my foot through the seam of the pants in the ankle.
4:22 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Search for another set of pants yields three pairs of possibly clean pants, one pair of 'not-so-clean but might make it if the lighting is dark' pants, two sets of leather pants (black and brown), two pair that have not seen an iron in many moons and one pair of pants I am sure Mac could fit into quite nicely.
4:24 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Search the hall closet for iron and ironing board.
4:28 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Search for an electrical socket in our room that is not occupied.
    Isaac enters and laughs at the state of my pant problem.
4:28 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
"Put your hand right here" as I point menacingly to the ironing board with hot iron in hand.
4:28 [3] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
"Mom's gonna kill you. Everyone else is almost ready. People are going to start arriving any minute."
4:29 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Zac enters the room with arms full of wrapping paper, scissors et al.
4:31 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Forget about the pants for the time being and start wrapping.
4:32 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Isaac joins in the fun.
    Zac notices there is no tape.
4:35 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
No one panics.
4:37 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Zac finds the silver packing tape.
5:09 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Wrapping winds down with some very sloppily wrapped gifts sitting on my bed.
5:11 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
"Screw this"
    Pull out the packing tape.
5:14 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Step downstairs to greet family members.
    Silver packing tape works wonders on pulled seams.

5:34 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Family shindig is in full swing as more family members arrive with arms full of presents.
5:36 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Zac questions, "What happened with your pants?"
5:38 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
I roll up my pants to show silver packing tape wrapped around the ankle.
    Much giggling follows.
6:41 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Game of paper, rock, scissor over who gets punted to the "children's table" is won by Zac.
6:45 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Bump my knees on the card table for the third time while watching cousin Jon snort milk up his nose through a straw.
6:46 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Observe the Jell-O mold that my aunt has brought with her.
    Cringe as I notice the fruit float in it is actually floating.
6:47 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Try to engage cousin Aimee into conversation.
6:48 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Give up after I realize she is reading a Harry Potter that is in her lap.
6:48 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mentally congratulate Aimee for her inventiveness.
6:49 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Excuse myself from table.
6:52 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Sit back down with copy of Reader's Digest stuffed into the back of my pants.
    Enjoy the rest of the meal while ignoring cousin Jon.
7:02 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Gift opening is initiated after the younger family members get so annoying that even the most patient of people cannot deny it.
7:05 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Zoe opens her Barbie doll.
7:07 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Barbie doll that I fought so hard to claim as my own is thrown aside in favor of a Blue Clue's dog that talks back.
    Weep for the Barbie doll.
7:08 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Plan the demise of the talking dog while opening my annual sweater from Aunt Susan.
    Paste fake smile on my face as I realize that this year's sweater is yellow with pink accents in it.
7:10 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Bury said sweater in ball of old wrapping paper, hoping someone will throw it away.
7:10 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Father notices.
    Gives the evil eye.
    Quietly fold sweater up and openly gush about the choice of colors.
7:16 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Find that one last present under the tree that someone has forgotten to put a nametag on.
7:17 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Watch as parents look to one another in the hopes that one will claim it before a child mistakenly opens it, thinking it is theirs.
7:19 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mother opens the gift.
7:21 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Cousin Aimee nearly tackles my mother in her haste to get her hands on her Harry Potter related book.
7:24 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Sound of Music is put into the VCR.
7:25 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Hanson siblings Isaac, Jessica, Avery, and myself begin our taunting of the movie.
7:49 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
"I am sixteen going on seventeen" scene plays and much giggling ensues.
7:50 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Aunt Susan steps into the room. "You are horrible. This movie is a classic."
7:51 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mocking of Aunt Susan begins after she has left the room.
9:18 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
All pack into the family van to head to church.
9:19 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Nine- tenths of the family embark on trip down Whiny Child Lane as they begin complaining about lack of room.
9:21 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
While searching for a radio station we can all agree on Mother passes a Christina Aguilera song.
    Zoe nearly cuts herself in half with the seatbelt she jumps up so fast.
9:22 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
We all bob our heads to Christina "Come On Over" Aguilera.
9:23 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Zoe is content for the rest of the car ride.
    Silence.
9:42 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Family unhinges itself from the van and step into the church.
9:46 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Family is bookended by Mother and Father in the hopes that a parent on each end will alleviate the urge to talk/giggle/breathe heavily/cause trouble/laugh/taunt others/poke/prod/kick/pinch/tickle/and or make any bodily function noises.
9:48 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
The children understand the parents' efforts but can only control themselves for no more than two minutes at a time.
    Chatting begins.
9:48 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mother begins her tyrade. "Zac!"
    "Zoe"
    "Avery" followed by the evil eye.
9:51 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mackenzie who is sitting next to my mother decides his seat isn't good enough and vaults himself over most of the other siblings to sit next to me.
9:52 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mac wants to talk.
9:53 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Father leans in to give Mac a pep talk.
9:54 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mac pouts.
9:55 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mac begins to play with the hem of my pants.
9:55 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mac notices the tape and laughs.
    Mac feels he must find someone else to share this new-found knowledge with so he pokes sister Jessica and shows her.
9:56 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Father notices.
    He tries hard not to laugh and keep his stern look.
    Fails.
    All the children are now staring at the hem of my pants.
9:57 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mother notices.
    Silence once again.
    Mother gives the evil eye accompanied by the we will discuss this later look.
9:58 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Mother turns her head back to the front of the church.
    All six children turn to me with looks of sympathy and you are so dead.
10:01 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Begin thinking of all the ways my mother can punish me for my lack of décor in church.
10:12 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Still counting the ways.
10:44 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Congregation encircles the church for the candlelight portion of the service.
    Mother never understands this part. She watches the children closely as they have been given fire to hold for an extended period of time.
10:46 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Family waits to see if Zac will burn himself this year with the wax.
10:47 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
OUCH!
    All is right with the Hanson family.
10:52 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Family packs back into the van for the ride home.
    Christmas caroling begins.
10:53 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Anxious faces turn to see if anyone knows anything but the first verse to any Christmas carol.
10:56 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Family makes it to seven swans are swimming when we finally abandon the Twelve Days of Christmas carol.
11:01 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Carry a sleeping Zoe up to her room.
11:03 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Assure Zoe that Santa will visit and she will get her presents.
11:03 [2] p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Reassure Zoe that even though she put a worm in Mackenzie's bed Santa will visit.
11:04 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Discover that Zoe was the one who stole my tape recorder back in the summer to tape her voice singing.
11:06 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Zoe continues her confessional.
11:09 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Assure her yet again that Santa is a forgiving fellow and will visit.
11:11 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
After a quick inventory of the kitchen I take a handful of cookies up to my room.
11:15 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Impromptu Christmas party begins as Zac steals cans of soda from the refrigerator.
11:21 p.m. December 24, 2000
   
Other children start filtering in to partake of the contraband foodstuffs.
11:25 p.m. December 24, 2000
    Zoe, intent of making sure that Santa doesn't stiff her by association, comes in to investigate.
11:29 p.m. December 24, 2000
    All members of the Hanson family under the age of 21 bunker down for an evening of chatting, eating and trying to keep our voices low.
12:07 a.m. December 25, 2000
    Zoe and Mackenzie are asleep. Jessica and Avery have claimed Isaac's and my beds. Zac is still wide-awake playing a computer game.
12:11 p.m. December 25, 2000
   
Isaac and I hide the evidence of our jailbreak party.
    Move Mac and Zoe back to their beds.
12:15 p.m. December 25, 2000
   
Isaac and I claim Avery and Jessica's beds for ourselves.
12:21 p.m. December 25, 2000
   
Isaac and myself giggle like children as we hear "Santa" stumble down the stairs to the Christmas tree, arms full of presents.

 

Merry Christmas!

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